Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Walk by Faith

I will be strong and courageous
I will not be terrified or discouraged
For the Lord my God is with me
Wherever I go
Joshua 1:9


A scripture on a set of Zac's dogtags that he held close to his heart.

I too am holding it close to mine. Sometimes the most difficult things in life are the ones that YOU have control over. Not knowing what to do or what road to take is sometimes more difficult than dealing with a challenge God has clearly set before you. Losing Zac was the most difficult thing I've ever had to deal with. Sitting beside a river watching helicopters, boats dragging nets with hooks attached, and divers search for your brother's body isn't easy. It's surreal. It's something I pray no family ever has to go through. However, as difficult as it was, there was also an inner peace that helped me to stay strong.

I can only pray that God will give me the same strength and inner peace as I deal with the situation at hand. This is different in the fact that I have complete control over choosing the outcome. It's a decision I thought I would never have to face. All I can do is pray. Pray that God gives me a clear understanding of what He wants me to do. I don't know what lies ahead. It may be best if I don't know.

All I do know is that life is short. It's not always easy. It's not always clear. However, each challenge seems to bring me closer to God and a I gain a clearer understanding of why things happen. As I look back on my life, the good and the bad, I'm beginning to see and understand why things happen and fall into place as they do. When we're faced with a life changing event, it's impossible to see past the "now." However, by having faith, I know that the future will be ok. It always is. It's not always easy getting where I'm meant to be, but I will get there. Me and God.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

beautifully said. my prayers are with you always...

jd

Ash said...

You know I'm here for you! I am praying for you each day and I know that God has better things ahead.

Janet said...

My prayers are with you!