Friday, June 5, 2009

Divorce

Divorce sucks. Divorce hurts. It's no fun for anyone involved. I don't care how mad you are, it's still surreal realizing the last 7 years of your life are coming to a close. Everything you built, or thought you built, over the years is ending. Your dreams, your hopes, your life...everything will change. But I guess change is something I'm used to these days. Doesn't make it easier, but it makes it a little more bareable. It's something I've learned to not be afraid of.

As I look back over the last seven years of my life, I'm appreciative of all the good times I've had. I'm appreciative of all the bad, because in some weird way, the bad times made me realize even more what I want in this life. They've made me realize what is important. That I will NOT settle for less than what my children and I deserve and what God expects a family to be.

Do I regret the last seven years of my life? Absolutely not. I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat if that's what it took to have Anna Lynn and Tripp in my life. They make my life worthwhile. They make me want to be a better person. A better mother. A better daughter. A better child of God. They ARE my life, and for that, I am thankful.

Life is short. We're not guaranteed tomorrow. We're not guaranteed the rest of today. What we do with our time is in our own hands. Our happiness is up to us. So, in order for me to find the true happiness I want, I deserve, I need...I'm moving on. I not waiting anymore for other people to change in order for me to be happy. It's up to me. No one else.

As I set off in a new direction in my life, I pray for God to give me the strength and guidance he's given me throughout the past year. I don't know exactly what lies ahead, but we'll make it through whatever comes our way. As long as my path leads me closer to Him, I know it's the right direction. It's not always easy to make yourself walk down a path you know is going to be difficult, but sometimes the destination is worth struggle you endure along the way.

So, yes, this sucks. This hurts. But we're gonna make it through. We are a team. Me, Anna Bugs, Trippers, and God.

9 comments:

CJ said...

Praying for you. :)

TheRichterCrew said...

I'm thinking of you girl! Hang in there and come see me sometime! Bring the kids to play!

Becky Shuler said...

Well said. Keep your faith strong and keep your chin up as you count your greatest blessings (your beautiful children). I'm praying for you, girl. You can get through this.

ellegirl said...

Sending you virtual hugs. I'll be praying for you and your sweet little ones during this difficult time.

Anonymous said...

So sorry to hear about this. I hope time passes swiftly and brings you good things on the other side...

Anonymous said...

I believe there are better days ahead. Miss you!

Anonymous said...

Baby girl He has never left us comfortless & never will. Not even now. We're a strong family with great faith, we've made it through some tough past years & we won't quit now. And remember, Zac, your bro is always watching over you & you know what he'd tell you now. And if you forget just look at your sister he brought into our lives & see the strength she has, know where it comes from, & remember we are all here for you sweet girl! You WILL do this with God's direction. Love, Mom

Janet said...

You and your gorgeous children will be in my prayers!! When God closes one door it's always to open another! Be strong and take care!!

Dee said...

Thanks guys for you kind words. We're doing great and will continue to do so. It's so great knowing I have so many wonderful friends and family. Love you all!